Buy a kilo of potatoes and a few slices of marinated lamb shoulder or steak from Giant/Tesco/Carrefour (pronouced as car-four as in kereta empat).
Cut potatoes and put onto a baking tray.
Into the oven they go. Meat on top, potatoes below. The goodness and richness (a.k.a. animal fat) from the meat will drip onto the potatoes. You do not need to do this if you consider it sinful.
Use high temperature, about 220-250 Celcius. "Bake" it for 15-20 minutes on one side, then flip the meat over, and continue for another 15-20 minutes. The meat should be done by now.
Now switch racks. Bring potatoes out, coat them with the goodness and richness, then put them on the top rack. Put the meat onto a plate and place it at the bottom, just to keep warm till serving time. Continue for another 15-20 minutes.
As you can see, the timing and temperature are just agak-agak. Hey I am teaching simplified cooking technique, not rocket science! If people ask why the meat not cooked one, say you meant it to be "partially done". If it's cooked to perfection, well, it's called "well done". If it's burnt, then say you like it "crispy". If it's very burnt, say it's "the portion meant for the dog". Hey I think I am sounding like a politician. If it's burnt beyond recognition, say some bullshit like "it's an act of God".
End result... drumroll...
... my dinner for tonight. Add a banana for the Malaysian-ness and mandarin orange for the GongXiFaCai.
No smoke in the kitchen, no splatter to clean up. You can enjoy your TV show throughout the cooking.
Dare to try?